Today saw the end of David Beckhams world cup dreams, and another four years of failure for the English national football team. I felt sorry for Becks, because at thirty one this is going to be the last time he'll ever captain the English side, and maybe the last time he'll play in it. Poor bugger.

Admittedly, i slept through most of the match and the last half hour was a bit shit, but hats off to the Portugese goalie. The man seemed to have some sort of prescient ability (thats seeing into the future for all you ill educated people out there) that allowed him to see exactly where the ball was going to go. Rooney? Wanker. No matter how much someone pisses you off, you dont go and stamp on their nuts. Not with footie boots on. Not in a game of football. What a penis. Its a game, for fucks sake. Admittedly a highly paid game, but a game nonetheless.

Mind you, i don't particularly like football.